A major manufacturer is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the number of calls they receive asking where the "Any" key is.
  

Technical support had a caller complaining that the mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on.
The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packed in.

A technician received a call complaining that the system wouldn't read word processing files from old diskettes.
It transpired that the customer had stuck labels on the diskettes, then rolled them into a typewriter to type on the labels.

A customer was asked to send a copy of the reported defective diskettes. A few days later, a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies of the diskettes.

A technician advised a customer to put the troubled floppy back in the drive and ensure the door was closed.
The customer asked the technician to hold on, and was heard to put the phone down, get up and go across the room to close the door.

A customer called to say they couldn't get the computer to fax anything.
After 40 minutes of very patient trouble-shooting, the technician discovered the customer was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.

A customer called to complain that the keyboard no longer worked.
After investigation it was discovered the customer had cleaned it by filling a tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them individually.

A technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because their computer had told them they were "bad and an invalid".
The technician explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses should not be taken personally.

A confused caller to a help desk was having trouble printing documents.
They told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer".
The user had tried turning the computer screen to face the printer, but the computer was still unable to "see" the printer.

An exasperated caller to Technical Support couldn't get their new computer to turn on.
After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked what happened when they pushed the power on button.
The response was "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happened.
The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.

A customer called Technical Support to say their brand-new computer wouldn't work.
They said they unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when they pressed the power on switch, they asked "What power on switch?"

A customer called the help desk to complain that the keyboard was producing characters totally unrelated to the keys being pressed.
The technician eventually discovered that the user did not like the Qwerty layout on the keyboard so had re-arranged the keys in alphabetical order.

A customer had trouble installing software and rang for support.
"I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second disk, and I had some problems with that disk but when it said to put in the third disk - I couldn't even fit it in"
The user hadn't realised that "Insert Disk 2" assumed that you had first removed Disk 1.

And finally a telephone conversation with a technician from a help line ...

Caller:    "Hello, is this Technical Support?"

Tech:     "Yes, it is. How may I help you?

Caller:    "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within warranty, how do I get that fixed?"

Tech:      "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"

Caller:     "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."

Tech:      "Please excuse me if I seem a bit confused, did you receive this as part of a promotion?"

Caller:     "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotion, it has '4X' on it."
   

The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off !!