Since my last report this employee has reached rock bottom and started to dig
   

   
His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity
   

     
I would not allow this employee to breed
   

      
This associate is not so much of a has been, more of a definitely will not be
   

      
Works well when constantly supervised and cornered, like a rat in a trap
   

   
When she opens her mouth it is merely to change the foot that is already in there
   

     
He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle
   

     
This person has delusions of adequacy
   

     
He sets low personal standards and constantly fails to achieve them
   

      
This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot
   

      
Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn't watching
   

      
This man should go far, and the sooner he starts the better
   

      
A room temperature IQ
   

      
Got a full six pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together
   

      
A gross ignoramus, i.e... 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus
   

      
A photographic memory but the lens cover is still on
   

      
A prime candidate for natural de-selection
   

       
As bright as Alaska in December
   

      
One celled organisms outscore him in IQ tests
   

      
Donated his body to science before he was finished using it
   

      
Fell out of the family tree
   

     
Lights flashing and gates down but no sign of the train
   

      
He has two brains, one lost and the other is out looking for it
   

      
If brains were taxed she would get a rebate
   

      
If he was any more stupid he would need to be watered twice a week
   

     
If you offered a penny for his thoughts you would get change
   

      
If you stand close enough to him you can hear the sea
   

     
It's hard to believe he beat 1,000,000 other sperm
   

      
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, this one only gargled
   

      
Takes him an hour and a half to skive for 60 minutes
   

      
Wheel is turning but hamster gone